do you realize…

I have some free time! Finally got some sketching in.
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It’s morning, it rained all night last night. The window door shutters were knocking and swaying last night, woke me up but its okay, I love the rain. I also sleep with ear buds (yes the ‘headphones’ that go in the ears, not ear plugs), so I can drown out my roommates snoring.
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This morning is very wet, and only a few cyclists went out to ride half of what today was suppose to be. We will all head to Annecy to be tourists this afternoon on this Sunday, of which everything is pretty much closed on Sundays and Mondays here in France.
It’s T-O-U-G-H being the only female tour leader, and basically literally being thrown to the wolves/sharks with all this. As you know, I am not a huge techie, road map reader, guide, etc. I am GREAT at being a socialiser and obviously social media, photography, organising all the food and water and clothing…so when I am called to do the technical stuff I fail, and I fail pretty hard. At least in my eyes, which I keep hearing repeatedly “Don’t worry too much about it, its not a big deal”. So much easier said than done. It’s like  slipping up with not 1 but 3 total tour leaders who have experience, 10+ years.
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Except some smaller stuff is a REALLY big deal, it’s so interesting to see other world views on everything. It has really opened my eyes even when I get offended and just flabbergasted at a lot of it, have to learn to step back and realize they are literally from a different part of the world then myself.
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Bumpy roads lead to great adventures, or something.
I just, my goal in life is to be taken seriously, not like a child, a part of the group. I can do it, if you give me a chance and allow for growth and MISTAKES to happen, like the natural flow of life. Hold your anger and outbursts, if you only realize what I have stepped into.
Traveling, jumping from hotel to hotel, repacking and packing to smaller or larger bags, eating properly, sleeping properly, being at the right place at the right time, etc.
I guess I have a problem with wanting everything to be perfect and flow smoothly, so when I consistently do stupid shit, I want to crawl in a hole. Perhaps its the sheltered life I’ve lived in Georgia, I don’t know. It doesn’t help that I haven’t traveled a lot so yeah something as simple as not directing people onto a highway, is total face palm worthy.
OVER WHELMING.
I guess that’s it for now.
I am excited for the future tour (Spain) and the rest of this one.
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